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1:47pm on Thursday the 20th of June
WEDNESDAY"S GREGALOGUE

This week, Kim Kardashian became the butt of criticism over a picture she posted of herself holding a cat, on Twitter. Apparently the oversized peach on stilts grabbed the cat by the scruff of its neck, and this raised concern that she might be hurting the pet.

Here's the deeply offensive picture.

<http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/2010/04/20/2010-04-20_kim_kardashians_handling_of_kitty_sparks_outrage_from_animal_rights_organization.html>

I know. Sickens you, doesn't it? Of course PETA, weighed in:

"Kim Kardashian isn't the only person who mistakenly thinks that because a mother cat picks up her kittens by the scruff of the neck that a supportive hand under the rump isn't needed."

Right. However, the other animal group, SPCA says the hold is pretty much fine - and that's where I get all my advice when I potty-trained Bill.

But then they add, "the manner in which Ms. Kardashian is holding the kitten could lead others to mishandle animals."

Which makes no sense. If the way she's holding the furball is fine, how could it cause others to hurt other cats? Weird. It's like the media's take on the tea parties. Sure, their protests are peaceful - but it could lead others to extremist violence!

Hopefully, not against kittens.

Anyway, this little tale shows you how much animal rights activists really know about animals. It's slightly less than their knowledge about humanity, which is nil. Fact is, they got into animal rights because people can't stand them. So they find comfort in this activism, thinking they're doing something for animals, when they're just doing something for their egos.

In fact, Kim's kitten clutch is the natural, correct way to hold a cat. Sorry PETA: Mommy cats can't cradle the kitten's bottom in its "supportive hand." Because it doesn't have a hand. It has paws. Hence they carry the kitten by the teeth - which is also how Andy Levy transports Pixel and Stormy when he's moving apartments.

And if you disagree with me, you're a racist homophobe who heckles during sex.

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