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9:11pm on Tuesday the 23rd of July
BREAKING LIKE THE WIND THAT GOT HIM INTO THE NEWS

A self-confessed "old fart" who was asked by his social club to go outside to break wind is in hospital - after he was blown over by a gale.

Bass-drinking pensioner Maurice Fox, 77, made national headlines when the Kirkham Street Sports and Social Club in Paignton, Devon, asked him to "go outside when required".

Mr Fox, from Princess Street, Paignton, was on his way to the nearby Palace Place Social Club when he was hit by a windy blast which knocked him over and caused a broken rib, bruised hip and grazes.

The Press Association digg this

An old gas bag being knocked down by wind would not count as news, except there is a whole backside to this story... What it really boils down to what kind of country is the UK becoming when a pensioner who has worked hard all his life can't let out a few juicy ones in the comfort of a social club?

P.S. Discretion is the watchword when laying wolf-bait in public. Dogs are allowed into pubs, could not the cogder have made sure a pooch took the fall? And the dog would not have been kicked out, because they have more rights than pensioners.

(h/t to Miss Mac for finessing the flatulence jokes)

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