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5:05am on Sunday the 16th of June
THE LEVY WAS (AND IS) DRY
As our dedicated Red Eye fan(s) can tell you, the Daily Gut's own Andrew Levy is the show's ombudsman and futures editor. He serves as the only check and/or balance on the resident pundits' rampant egos (well, if you don't count the Nielsen ratings system). Go down to the orange part of the post for some of Levy's more notable bon mots from the past week!
digg this
[Again, the following is all Levy's awesomeness. I'm just watching it again on the DVR and typing it out.]
  • "My porn name is 'Tucker Carlson.' Weird."
  • [Quickly putting down Women's Day magazine] "Oh! Hey, Greg. Just readin' 'bout the big game yesterday..."
  • "We're working on a story about the Japanese health minister. He infuriated the Japanese public by calling women... I think it's 'Super Terrific Birth-Giving Fun Mechabots'? My Japanese is a little rusty."
  • "Hey, that was a great breaking story on Barbara Streisand giving money to Democrats. Does Brit Hume know about that?"
  • "Tomorrow we've got a look at a growing community of free-thinkers on the Internet who believe the government is beaming voices into their minds... [pauses, touches ear] ...Uh, I'm now being told not to do that story."
Andrew: Hey, have you heard about these Harvey Potter books?
Greg: I think they're actually Harry Potter books.
Andrew: Okay, dork.
  • "I'm not positive, but did Rachel actually come out in favor of nuclear war? I guess that's kind of easy when you're Canadian and you know nobody's going to waste a nuke on you."
  • "Tomorrow, Red Eye correspondent Toby Johnson will tackle the age-old question, 'The Earth: Do we need it?' The answer may surprise you."
Andrew: There's a report out of Idaho that for the last 6 years, Morley Safer has actually been a Lucasfilm CGI creation. I don't even know, what's a "CGI creation"?
Greg: It's something computer-generated.
Andrew: Date much, Greg?
  • "Rachel, earlier you said, 'Clint Eastwood has won who knows how many acting awards?' I know how many: None."
  • "Tomorrow, we'll follow Monsignor Patrick T. Waters as he prays for the souls of those who lay dying. That's the first installment of a recurring weekly segment on faith in America that we're calling Friday Night Rites."
Greg: It's time for our ombudsman, Andrew Levy. Andrew, tell us what we did right and what we did wrong.
Andrew: Hey, Greg. She hated pills.
Greg: She what?
Andrew: That was in response to your question, "What can you say about Anna Nicole Smith that nobody else is saying?"
  • "Dan, you said that in her last days, Anna Nicole had been acting 'crazy' and 'different.' Which one was it?"
  • "If you think I'm gonna make fun of Pat Dollard, you're out your damn mind."
  • "Tomorrow, Michael Medved will join us for a discussion about how Hollywood is dealing with the sudden death of Anna Nicole Smith; we'll have a look at how the untimely death of Anna Nicole Smith sent shockwaves through the Chicago Mercantile Exchange; I'm going to talk to Islam expert Daniel Pipes about how the Muslim world is coping with the lamentable death of Anna Nicole Smith; Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia will break down the legal issues surrounding the tragic death of Anna Nicole Smith; and finally, we're going to talk to Republican strategist Mary Matalin about how the unexpected death of Anna Nicole Smith may affect the President's troop surge... Also, the Grammys are on Sunday! Oooh. That's all I got on the Grammys: Oooh."
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