12:13pm on Wednesday the 23rd of October
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Fresh from the DAILYGUT.COM


By Uncle Jesse
It's like Intervention if by Intervention you mean Promising RedEye Intern Candidates.

Jim Norton, if hilarity were a soda fountain, I'd fill up on him until the foam spilled over the top.
By Igotapee
Jim Norton if telling jokes were a window Andy Levy would get annoyed when I banged him in the News Room.

Mike Baker if chasing bad guys were KFC I`d want his meat in my mouth.

Kinsey Schofield she knows the web like I know the web.... I gotta stop letting my house boys tie me up.
By azideam
Jim Norton; if comedic genius were a jar of Ovaltine, I'd (twist, open, pop) his lid to get at his granules.
By Thegr8wun
love the show, but gezz, enough with the "tonights musical guest" type of segments, you didn't get your fanbase because you wanted to be another johnny carson. no need to tinker with something that ain't broken.
By DarkUrthe
Jim Norton, so funny that lonely clowns subscribe to Playjim

Mike Baker, if fierce commentary were a Hooters, tight shorts wearing coeds would be in him.

Andrew WK, he knows singing like I know Sing Sing. I stole car radios when I was young.
By AUTiger89
Welcome to Red Eye, it's like The Longest Yard, if by Yard you mean Hangover.

Jim Norton, if hilarity were a power line, men would climb his pole when he needed servicing.

Mike Baker, if manliness were vegetables, gardeners would plant his seed in the spring.
By AUTiger89
Kinsey Schofield, if brains and beauty were condiments, diners would spread her on their buns.

Andrew W.K., if musical talent were bingo, old ladies would read numbers off his balls.
By azideam
Mike Baker; if good looks were eggs and Spam; I'd be ashamed to eat him. And the Tang would make it a criminal act.
By azideam
Kinsey Schofield; she knows things I.T. like I know things I pee. Asparagus comes to mind...
By azideam
Andrew WK; if musical chops were a sausage, I'd close my eyes in horror and try not to think about what's in him.
By azideam
Bill Schulz; he thinks Miracle Whip is a bondage act.
By JGalt84
Welcome to Red Eye, it's like The Sound of Music, if by Music you mean Headboards.
By valleysam
Welcome to Redeye - It's like Welcome to the Doll House; if by doll house, you mean storage shed.

Bill Schulz - His parole officer thinks he's perfoming his community service.
By Balrog28
Welcome to Redeye - It's like Nightmare on Elm Street; if by Elm, you mean Crazy.

Kinsey Schofield - she's so hot, people order Schofield cross buns at breakfast.
By dustrider
Welcome to Red Eye -- It's like "Body Double", if by 'double' you mean 'dumping'.

...and he's a big joke who's almost broke, it's our New York Times correspondent; good to see you, Pinch.
By Remman
Mike Baker, if insightful commentary were a hamburger, I'd put my pickle on him.

Jim Norton, if comic genius were wind section, marching bands would blow him at football games.

Kinsey Schofield, she's so sexy she turns my floppy disc into a hard drive.

Andrew WK, if musical genius were loose change, he'd jiggle around in my pants.

By underdog
Welcome to Redeye - It's like Family Ties, if by Family, you mean Zip.
By Poland
Jim Norton, sexiest hair in showbiz. If wit were a candle, I'd blow him out before leaving the room.
By darinhansen
Jim Norton - Necrophiliacs wish him good health.
By Craigonomics
Welcome to Red Eye - it's like nepotism but your cousin the CEO gets you a different type of job.
By greylear26
I think Kinsey was great- loved hearing her laugh. Can't wait for you guys to have her back

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