12:11pm on Wednesday the 23rd of October
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Fresh from the DAILYGUT.COM


By azideam
Greg Proops; if comic genius were a garden, I'd plant his seed in the spring.
By azideam
Juliet Huddy; if good looks were a Big Wheel, I'd ride her everyday in my driveway.

Alison Rosen; she knows hosting webcasts like I know wearing Mexican wrestling masks. They call me El Santo!
By azideam
Bill Schulz... you can order him "con leche" (with milk).
By AUTiger89
Welcome to Red Eye, it's like Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, if by chocolate you mean Meth and by Factory you mean lab.
By Brody McBrohiem
Greg Proops - If comedic genious was a football game, I would put on protection before doing him. I'm prone to head injuries people

Alison Rosen - She's so precious, jewlery is now made from Allison Rosen stones.
By AUTiger89
Juliet Huddy, if beauty were an oven, bakers would put their dough in her, after it rises.
By AUTiger89
Alison Rosen, if beauty and brains were a locomotive, travelers would ride in her caboose.
By Iverson3
Welcome to Red Eye, its like Land Before Time if by Time you mean Bill.

Greg Proops; if witty humor was an old couch, I'd put him out on the curb.
By Remman
Greg Proops, he's so intelligent the phrase "smart ass" is now called "Greg Proops ass."

Alison Rosen, she's so sexy she makes me do a pencil dance, usually when I'm in the shower.

Juliet Huddy, if journalistic excellence were mime I'd do her without making a sound.

Welcome to Red Eye it's like the Big Lebowski, if by Lebowski you mean rash.

By tintinismybelgian
Red Eye: It's like drowning in the bathtub, but on your own vomit and filth.

Bill Schulz: In Thailand, he can be found on the bargain rack.

Dos Equis Guy: If smooth moves were cellphone reception, dorky looking men with glasses would walk around him asking, "Can you hear me now?"--Bill, that's your safe word over at Love Potato Cottage, isn't it?
By DarkUrthe
Greg Proops he know good hair, like I know back hair

Juliet Huddy she is so wonderful that strawberry shotcake leaves a protest on her front porch

Alison Rosen she knows ustream like I know crossing streams. I am wildly inaccurate at urinal troths people.

Broheim from Dos Equis he knows viral ads like I know viruses.
By DarkUrthe
Welcome to Red Eye, its like HR Puffnstuff .... if you look at our stoner demographics.

Bill Schulz, the poison to my pen, the fail to my win and the chicken to my hen. In Canada he is a tax write off.
By valleysam
Welcome to Redeye - It's like The Parent Trap; if by parent, you mean nude model.

Bill Schulz - He has more STD's than a Greenwich Village free clinic.
By Uncle Jesse
The sinister to my intentions, the Geneva to my conventions, the overdose to my abstentions, it's my repulsive sidekick Bill Schultz. He's a taste tester for Fancy Feast.
By Uncle Jesse
Welcome to Red Eye, it's like The View if by The View you mean Grizzly Hobo Camp Massacre.
By dustrider
Welcome to Red Eye -- It's like "Grizzly Adams", if by 'Adams' you mean 'crime scene'.

...and he's got a Pulitzer stash, but is fresh out of cash, it's our New York Times correspondent; good to see you, Pinch.

By Poland
Welcome to Red Eye, it's like Lucas With the Lid Off, if by lid, you mean pants.

By TulsaTornado
Welcome to Red Eye, it's just like 'Twilight', if by 'Twilight', you mean 'Morning Hangover'..

Juliet Huddy, she's so sweet, nearsighted honey bees keep trying to pollinate her..

Greg Proops, he's funnier than a Congressman getting caught taking under the table cash from a desperate griffin..

Alison Rosen, she's so sharp, Japanese chefs use her instead of knives at Benihana..
By TulsaTornado
Bill Schulz, he's been banned in Buffalo..
By Jersey Dave
Greg Proops - He's so funny that laughing gas is now called Greg Proops gas. I hear it smells like peanut butter.

Juliet Huddy: She's cuter than a Smurf being pulled apart between four My Little Ponies.

Bill Schulz: Well, he's the Bad to my Bone, the Indiana to my Jones, and the Twilight to my Zone. It's my disturbing co host Bill Schulz. He's a bad man, a very bad man.
By Jersey Dave
Alison Rosen: If looking good were a crime she'd be wanted in 49 states. You know about Massachusetts.
By underdog
Welcome to Red Eye, it's like Murder She Wrote, if by Murder, you mean Help.
By underdog
Need more S.E. Cupp - with glasses.

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