12:20pm on Wednesday the 23rd of October
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Fresh from the amspec

GUT'S NEW COLUMN FROM AMSPEC!

 
By Jim Treacher
Shoes?



For that matter: Pants?
By Sigmond
Suppose a saxophone was Heather Mills missing leg..What then?
By mcaffrey
You had a nice Dave Barry vibe going there.



In fact, I think I am going to start forwarding your email around the internet and say it was written by Dave Barry. Someone has to keep those Snopes people in business.
By Jim Treacher
Gutfeld returns your e-mails?
By mcaffrey
Ah, I seem to have shown poor composition skills in my earlier post.



I meant that I was going to put his article into an email and forward it around the internet. Its not as funny when I have to explain it. Dammit.





By DarkUrthe
I think greg shoudl have his own magazine called "G."



Oprah could be on every cover... it makes no sense, but that gal sells the magazines...
By jd nyc
mcaffrey -

Tell me about it!!

The next thing you know, they'll be sending you off to "Puh... puh... puh... puh... that country over there"



at least they have fast food outlets, though - if you ever get to Mohamme-Donald's, I recommend Value Meal #6: a small dead goat with a side of hummus
By jd nyc
and before you ask, live goats are only sold ....a la carte....
By Borchy
"No one really works at Best Buy. They just make sure you leave the store with a receipt."



This must be in the employee handbook.
By sawbuck
"at least they have fast food outlets, though - if you ever get to Mohamme-Donald's, I recommend Value Meal #6: a small dead goat with a side of hummus"



Is this the 'kid' meal? The one with the toy scimitar?
By BiggusDickus
"[If] you roll [a Hummer] over a Prius, you're okay by me."



Would this act result in a carbon-offset credit differential?
By Steve L.
The Clash was the Greatest Band EverŪ.
By conehead
So if you're dumber because you've been on television, and Rosie, Dan Rather, and Al Gore have been on television longer than you have, then...
By tootsie


Gut sez: "Ugly people are generally bad people (you can see this manifest itself in the correlation between bitter anger and homeliness in the likes Al Franken and Charles Manson)."



Further proof of Gut's theoretical truism is phukwits: butt-ugly Bill Maher & Rosie McD. also Dorothy's nemesis, The Wicked Witch.



By daylate
Television is like becoming a drunk, except that you throw up a little less on your shoes.

------------------------------------------------------------

No. All one has to do is swallow their own vomit, smile, and pick up the check.



Back in 1955, the late and great Ernie Kovacs said: "Television is a medium, so called because it is neither rare nor well done."
 
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